Facing death, time to drop everything.

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
When we or someone we love is told they have limited time to live we are often filled with all kinds of feelings and questions. There is anger, denial, maybe hope for a miracle cure. If there is a faith, a calling out to a higher being for help, support, understanding, healing or a smooth transition. Maybe there is acceptance or even relief.Perhaps more often, all of it at once in a kaleidoscope of emotions, thoughts, feelings and behaviours. None of which feel like the right response, usually. I dropped everything and faced death When or if we are told a timeline, we ought to take it seriously.So often our response is, “yes, but ….” followed by all the reasons the time line may not be correct. A miracle cure, a positive mental attitude, a new drug trial, the love of those around them. But that timeline, usually offered by an experienced medical professional or maybe someone who has lived this path...
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Don’t pick a fight with a menopausal therapist

by Lisa Harris3 Comments
... you won't win. Anyone who knows me, knows I have been living with menopause for over 15 years. I know, I don't look old enough right? That's because I entered menopause in my mid 30's, medically there was no other option.And yeah, it more than sucks. So, whilst those around my own age are actively now talking about their peri-menopause, collagen, magnesium, exercise, hormonal shifts, dryness and general feeling of wtaf is happening to my body - I am nodding thinking, "Yah. I know" while my knees, hip and back hurts, I am STILL trying to shift some weight and I maintain the inability to so much as look at a polo neck without setting off a flush.Did I mention the bladder issues that creep up? Oh, you haven't got that far yet? Well, you will ...But 15 years ago, nobody was talking about this, social media wasn't full of it and celebs weren't breaking their necks to tell you...
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Muddy boots

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
Finding strength I didn't know I had Fresh air and exercise is good for us, of course. Like many, I enjoy scenery and sunshine if possible. Health issues have made exercise more challenging in recent years and I'm trying my best to stick with it and make improvements. Aching I was aching, tired and looking at the rather steep incline ahead of me feeling increasingly despondent and dreading the struggle I knew it would be. I felt my pace slow and my steps become smaller. Somewhere within I was convincing myself this was good for my physical and mental health, reminding myself I'll be glad I've done this later. Really, all I wanted to do was stop and huff and puff a bit with my hands on my hips. Woe is me Suddenly as I was slipping into "woe is me" I realised I was actually slipping into the hillside, fast.With each step my feet were sinking quickly into a boggy mess that had been...
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Reflection and journals

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
Today's addition to my journal :A piece by Mother TeresaAn albanian- Indian nun1910-1997 I often journal my thoughts, reflections or things I've read that have resonated with me. Today it is this.So, in short ... Forgive anywayBe kind anywaySucceed anywayBe honest and frank anywayBuild anywayBe happy anywayDo good anywayGive the world the best you've got anywayIt was never between you and them anyway. The photo is of my journal where I've written this out in full. (Complete with an error!) Reflecting is an important part of being a therapist and supervisor. Inspiration, ideas, thought process, drawings and doodles, wise words from another, realisations, fears, achievements and more can all be recorded or perhaps unpacked in journals. Free writing or free scribbles can unlock, reveal or remind us of so much. Reading back through our journals we can often follow our journey, see our progress, recognise themes or be simply reminded of things we'd forgotten.Sometimes this can help us prepare for supervision or support our own therapy. The...
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Processing Baggage?

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
When you see yourself on zoom and realise you might look more EasyJet vibe than the therapist in Autumn vibe you had anticipated!I suppose both process baggage?! I suppose the reality here is I care less what someone looks like (myself included) and I am more interested in if they show up, like, really show up. Show up Working online now for nearly 6 years, (yes it is that long since the pandemic arrived) I have probably seen most things when people turn their cameras on. Toast stuck in your hair - Make up running down your face - your favourite dressing gown - your work top with joggers - pets, children, post deliveries ... Be ready to process the baggage I really don't mind what I see when you log in ( no nudity please, that really is a line!) I mind that you logged in. I mind a lot that even on what might be the most difficult day, or when you have had...
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Human First

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
*Deep breath* My hard learning this week ... I am part of a wonderful trio of super-supervisors. We are women who meet monthly for a few hours of peer supervision. Between us we have decades of experience both as #therapists and #supervisors. We are knowledgeable, self aware, hard working, compassionate and funny. We hold each other accountable, we cheer each other on, we lean into the difficult conversations and we sit together to find ways forward in the 'what do I do' moments. We are grateful for each other and appreciate the input we offer as the years of experience offer fruitful guidance and knowledge. Want to know what else we are??#HumanFirst! Human-ness I often say, before we are anything we are human first. By that I mean we are impacted just like the rest of the humans on earth, by our experiences, we have emotions, we have struggles and joys. Just because we are a therapist or supervisor, it doesn't mean we are not human. In fact,...
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Move with the seasons

by Lisa Harris1 Comment
23 years ago, on the 24th July 2002 I arrived in East Yorkshire, utterly broken, with very very little to my name, only intending to be passing through until I found somewhere to settle.I was in my mid 20's. How very different my life is now, although there are different challenges. I have my own home, a career, a business I love and a faith I wouldn't be without. All of which came after 2002. When you have lost everything In 2002 life was very painful and so very difficult, I had lost everything I loved and knew. Injustice stung daily to the core of me. I wasn't sure I could cope with life now or even if I wanted it anymore. If you know how this feels, you know. If you don't, I hope you never will. Depression, anxiety and pain were my familar friends for more years than I care to recall. Tears and loneliness were a daily thing over and over, and...
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The smallest gate in the world

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
The smallest gate in the world?!A metaphor.This popped up in my photo memories, reminding me of a lovely day.What I see in it today is slightly different to what I did then.Today I'm pondering ...Even when there's a small gate, we can still pass through and there can be joy, adventures and happiness at the other side.Today it speaks to me of challenging times, and of the reminder many have trodden a path before us and many will come after. The way forward has been made easier by them, if we realise it or not.All, pass through. There's always a way We never really know what's beyond a tight squeeze in life, but I do know diamonds are formed under extreme pressure.And, there's always a way.Take a breath.Look for the small gate Look for the small gate...
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Sometimes only a swear word will do

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
If you're wondering what it would be like to hear me say such a thing, just try saying it in a Geordie accent  As a fellow therapist said to me quite some time ago when we were discussing congruence, and ethics of authenticity and genuineness - "Sometimes only a swear word will do!" Be authentic In therapy and supervision I invite those I work with and support to be their authentic self. In turn, I offer my authentic self too. That means, if you swear that's ok with me.If you don't swear, that's ok with me.If you use wild hand gestures that's ok with me.If you express yourself in contemporary dance or song that's ok with me.If you want to show me your pet that's ok with me.If you struggle to find words that's ok with me.If you feel really emotional that's ok with me.If you want to draw or write what's in your thoughts that's ok with me.If you want to scream that's...
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Lisa – the human

by Lisa HarrisNo Comments
The truth is I am a real, whole and yet unfinished person who is always learning more about myself and the world.   I laugh, I cry, I swear sometimes.  I enjoy being outside, preferably in nice weather, my body does not enjoy winter much.  I am a fan of theatre and live shows - I will cry and laugh in all the right places, mostly.  I used to read a lot. Now I am experimenting to be more creative having always thought I wasn't good at it. I draw, doodle, colour in, it helps calm or focus my mind.  I always take too many photos.  I am rubbish at technology compared to most, I understand people, not things. The truth is I have no real desire to be better at technology or to use it more than I need to.  I enjoy cooking  I am rubbish at late nights and I get peopled out after a while. I love sunrises and sunsets, I will never tire of seeing...
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