Self-Esteem Archives - Lisa Harris

Gaslighting and Self-Doubt: When You Stop Trusting Yourself Understanding how repeated denial, blame and manipulation can affect our confidence, our memories and our ability to trust our own perceptions. Have you ever found yourself questioning a conversation after it has happened? Replaying what was said, wondering whether you misunderstood, or feeling certain that something was wrong but struggling to explain why? Most of us experience uncertainty from time to time. We forget details, misinterpret situations or disagree with someone about what happened. These are ordinary parts of being human. But what happens when questioning yourself becomes a regular feature of a relationship? When your recollection is repeatedly denied, your feelings are dismissed, or you find yourself apologising for things you do not understand? Over time, repeated experiences like these can undermine confidence and leave someone increasingly unsure of their own judgement. In the context of domestic abuse, one term often used to describe a particularly harmful pattern of psychological manipulation is gaslighting. Understanding what gaslighting means, how...

Domestic Abuse: When Love, Trust and Safety Become Complicated Understanding the less visible forms of abuse, the impact on our sense of self, and why recognising what is happening can be so difficult. Domestic abuse is often imagined as physical violence: visible injuries, frightening confrontations or incidents that leave no doubt that something is wrong. But domestic abuse does not always look like this. Sometimes it is much quieter. It may develop gradually within a relationship that began with affection, connection and the promise of a shared future. It may involve criticism, manipulation, intimidation, controlling behaviour or a persistent sense of walking on eggshells. There may be no visible injuries. There may be moments of genuine affection, apologies and promises that things will change. From the outside, the relationship may appear perfectly ordinary. And yet, behind closed doors, a person's confidence, independence and sense of safety may be gradually eroding. Domestic abuse is not simply about arguments, relationship difficulties or two people who struggle to communicate. It...