Relationships Archives

Gaslighting and Self-Doubt: When You Stop Trusting Yourself Understanding how repeated denial, blame and manipulation can affect our confidence, our memories and our ability to trust our own perceptions. Have you ever found yourself questioning a conversation after it has happened? Replaying what was said, wondering whether you misunderstood, or feeling certain that something was wrong but struggling to explain why? Most of us experience uncertainty from time to time. We forget details, misinterpret situations or disagree with someone about what happened. These are ordinary parts of being human. But what happens when questioning yourself becomes a regular feature of a relationship? When your recollection is repeatedly denied, your feelings are dismissed, or you find yourself apologising for things you do not understand? Over time, repeated experiences like these can undermine confidence and leave someone increasingly unsure of their own judgement. In the context of domestic abuse, one term often used to describe a particularly harmful pattern of psychological manipulation is gaslighting. Understanding what gaslighting means, how...

Coercive Control: The Abuse That Can Be Difficult to See Understanding how patterns of control can develop within relationships, gradually affecting freedom, independence and our sense of self. When we think about domestic abuse, we often think about individual incidents: an argument that escalates, a threat, an act of intimidation or an episode of physical violence. But some of the most damaging experiences of abuse cannot be understood by looking at individual incidents alone. Instead, they develop through a pattern of behaviour that gradually changes how another person lives, what they feel able to do and how safe they feel within their own relationship. This is known as coercive control. It can be difficult to recognise, both for the person experiencing it and for those around them. There may be no obvious injuries, no single incident that seems to explain the distress, and no clear moment when the relationship changed. Instead, there may be a gradual narrowing of freedom. A person may begin to think more carefully about...