Don’t pick a fight with a menopausal therapist

… you won’t win.

Anyone who knows me, knows I have been living with menopause for over 15 years.
I know, I don’t look old enough right?
That’s because I entered menopause in my mid 30’s, medically there was no other option.
And yeah, it more than sucks.

So, whilst those around my own age are actively now talking about their peri-menopause, collagen, magnesium, exercise, hormonal shifts, dryness and general feeling of wtaf is happening to my body – I am nodding thinking, “Yah. I know” while my knees, hip and back hurts, I am STILL trying to shift some weight and I maintain the inability to so much as look at a polo neck without setting off a flush.
Did I mention the bladder issues that creep up? Oh, you haven’t got that far yet? Well, you will …

But 15 years ago, nobody was talking about this, social media wasn’t full of it and celebs weren’t breaking their necks to tell you which product is AMAZING for their symptoms. I spent years not really understanding, and no doctor was listening to me and how much my mental and physical health was plummeting. I finally got HRT 3 years ago when I couldn’t have been clearer I CANNOT go on like this in this body and mind one day longer, I just can’t.

Now you have an image and slight insight into the length of struggle and numerous symptoms, whilst trying to chuffing navigate, you know, LIFE.

So if you are wondering why menopausal women MIGHT be a bit frustrated and perhaps sick of putting up with pointless dramas, you might have a little more of an idea now.

Stay with me …

Now imagine you are a therapist as well. Your job is (in some ways and very broadly speaking) to call people out on their bullshit and make them face up to what is going on.

Just so we are clear, we are struggling with brain fog, we may be raging on the inside, wincing at all our aches, pains, temperature changes, general discomfort, leaky bits, too dry bits, lack of sex drive, huge sex drive, plummeting mental health, itchy skin, irritability, hair that is falling out, crippling anxiety that came from, well, nowhere, perpetual headaches, lack of sleep, brain fog (did I say that already?) … and yet we are still showing up because you know, bills … and offering empathy, positive regard, holding a safe and confidential space and genuinely, truly, genuinely, loving what we do.

Now imagine someone tries to pick a fight with you, doesn’t matter where or what about. Maybe they are treating you like a mug, not listening to you, perhaps they are not behaving in a manner that could be considered reasonable, who knows they may even be attempting to do you over or do you out of something you are entitled to.

You feel that? That’s the inside of you saying “Ohh yeah I hear you sister” or “Ohhh yeah, I know what happens next, ima back away now”.

The truth is, as a fellow wonderful human said to me this week, “The energy it takes to not be raving mad is underestimated”.

And that, dear reader. Is why you should never, knowingly, pick a fight with a menopausal therapist. Because we are actually human first. We have used all our energy to maintain our sanity ‘at work’ and so you press that button and you can bet we will call out bullshit when we see it, we will not stand for being unheard, mistreated or dismissed. We are ready and willing to have an outlet that a sound bath, walk or mindful meditation just won’t touch right now.

We are so ready for you.

**Unless it is after 9pm and in which case we have had enough of the world and are probably in bed, in blissful silence if at all possible. Knowing we will be awake on and off all night for no real reason and have to do it all again tomorrow.